Deep dives and playlists

Part of my personality is that when I get interested in a topic, I DEVOUR it. I know I’ve mentioned this before, but in case you’re new, when something sparks an interest, I end up buying every book I can find about it, watching every movie, stalking every internet post, and learning as much as I can.

Thoroughly.

I’ve done this on disparate topics like classic Hollywood stars (Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, James Dean, Marilyn Monroe, Fred Astaire, and so on), Viking mythology (especially after reading the Magnus Chase books—I need a Magnus tattoo, I think), and Jack London (after visiting the Wolf House in Sonoma). Every Wes Anderson movie? Check. Every Sofia Coppola movie? [almost] Check. All the books on Bansky? Yes. A dozen books-plus on Yosemite National Park? Yes.

I do this with music, too. I’ll fall in love with a performer and buy (or stream) every one of their albums, read their biographies, and buy all their art books. Today, I went on a bit of a trip through time, listening to some music I haven’t listened to since the early 90s. (Love and Rockets, anyone?) But the last ten or twenty songs I’ve listened to are so disparate, it’d be really hard for you to tell my tastes.

In case you were wondering, they were mostly from me looking up songs I heard in movies, plus a few things from the Kid Cudi Spotify list:

Blinding Lights by The Weeknd

Immigrant Song by Led Zeppelin

Symphonies by Dan Black

Crazy in Love remix by Beyoncé

Hangover by Psy

Wake Up by Arcade Fire

Get Low by Lil Jon

Loco in Acapulco by the Four Tops

Summertime by DJ Jazzy Jeff

Here You Come Again by Dolly Parton

Yo Perreo Sola by Bad Bunny

Supersonic Rocket Ship by The Kinks

Ooh Ahh by Grits

Thunderstruck by AC/DC (I know) and

Dear Mr. Fantasy by Traffic.

I think that might be about as random as you can get. Just rereading that list makes me laugh (and if you want me to send you the Apple Music link, let me know). No wonder I love Beck, because he’s all of the above.

Can you figure out where the inspiration came from for some of those? Mostly Marvel movies (Thor, Black Panther, Spiderman), Red, White, and Royal Blue (an amazing book), and The Secret Life of Walter Mitty.

Anywho.

I don’t know what gets me started on one of these rabbit trails, but I know better than to hold back. Because these things often show up in my writing later on in strange ways. That’s one of the big things I’ve learned over the past few years is to trust my instincts and follow my enthusiasm, even if I think it’s fluffy or weird. If I’m passionate about it and want to know everything about it, I let myself do it. I don’t hold back.

My current deep dive is into ballet. I took about 6 years of ballet as a kid, dropping it right before I was going to go en pointe. I don’t think it’s something I’ve ever truly forgotten about or gotten over. With the graceful elegant bodies and the emotion of dance…I can tell I’m gearing up into some sort of inspiration, but I don’t know what for. All I know is I’ve been watching Misty Copeland’s MasterClass and looking at books on technique and history.

But I can’t explain WHY I’m doing this, and why now? Maybe because I saw an ad for the MasterClass (and I’ve watched quite a few of those)? Is it really that easy to get me hooked?

Or is it something deeper? [We know I always love to go deeper into why characters do things. And obvs, myself.] But is it a need for beauty and expression, poise and strength, dignity and fragility all at once? Especially in the rough few weeks we’ve been having? Few months…?

Some of it, I think, is that I need to follow my genuine interests, whatever they are. I think part of my recovery from depression was learning to not suppress positive emotion. I realize that sounds weird, but besides the guilt/anger/grief I was suppressing, I also had not let myself ENJOY things.

I do now.

What is it that you love? Can you let yourself do it? Or learn about it? Or watch it? Or listen to it?

Even if it’s weird?