don't do it

I could tell you some very funny and clever stories this week about everything that has gone wrong. Kind of like Alexander’s Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day, except the 2021 tech/work version.

I’m so tempted. It’s driving me crazy not to go into detail about every single point because really, you’d have to hear it!

Because I’d tell you and then you’d tell me how this one time you had some series of insane things happen, too that OMG it was AWFUL. And I’d tell you more details about my week.

It would be funny. We’d sympathize (empathize?) with each other. We’d be entertained by how the Universe has a sense of humor at our expense.

But the problem is, I’m one of those weirdos who thinks that what you put your attention on grows. Long ago I developed the habit to state things in the positive so that I will receive them, rather than in the negative (to avoid getting things I don’t want) because it just doesn’t work that way. Instead of saying, “traffic is awful,” I’ll think, “I get to listen to my amazing audiobook for longer than I thought.”

As a result, I usually have fabulous times at things that most people dread—the dentist, buying a car or new cell phone, even filing taxes—because I put a positive spin on them and look for the good. Life is fun!

I’m only human, though. And some things challenge me. Like this week. I could tell you about—

NO.

I’m not going to tell you.

I don’t want to have to go through it again. Too stressful to have things not work.

This is why I personally don’t think you should talk about physical ailments with anyone except a doctor or those who need to know because it makes you pay attention to them and have more of them. Plenty of people do this, and I’ll listen to be polite. But IMHO if you want to be healthy, focus on health, not ailments.

But I guess this post is to acknowledge two things.

One, that in our culture, being positive can sometimes be a challenge. I often feel like I’m swimming against the current of so many who want to talk about all that is wrong instead of all that is right. And it takes focus to pay attention to that which is going well. I can be accused of being an ostrich/naïve/out of it/privileged. I am. And I know—oh, how I know—how many bad things are going on for so many people. (Part of the reason for my blog is to help as many as I can, so that’s my way of helping. Or at least one of the ways I try to uplift others.)

And two, that being positive is worth it. I go so smoothly through life that when I get knocked off like this, it’s almost hilarious, because I can see how it came about. I can see the spiral of how focusing on this one little negative thing brought another and another. It’s a reminder to knock it off—girl, don’t tell that story—which can be hard to do mid-spiral.

Which is why we start each day new. Which is why I personally meditate each morning to reset the day. Why I remind myself to focus on what I want rather than what I don’t want.

But if I don’t do that perfectly …

Well, this is what I’m telling myself.

It’s okay to vent. It’s okay to be human.

But don’t stay in this place of negativity.

Being negative is a spiral.

I can stop that spiral.

I can remember to get back on the positive track as fast as possible. Because that way is much, much better.